Posted in Podcast Show Notes, September 2018

Show Notes: “What is Love?”

What is love? Such a simple question. Not so simple to answer.

This week we explore what ‘love’ actually means. It’s easy to think you know the answer, but don’t be fooled by what you’ve heard over the years.

Listen in as we talk about the many ways love is defined and then narrow in on what we think is the greatest definition of all.

Listen to the full episode here

To read the complete transcript click here

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Posted in Podcast Show Notes, September 2018

Show Notes – “Affair Prevention: Guard Your Marriage”

As a follow up to last week’s discussion wherein Matt and I shared what it looked like for us to recover after an affair, it seemed only fitting to also share with you some things we have learned that made our marriage vulnerable in the first place.

It is our desire to equip and encourage married couples to not only stay faithful but to thrive while doing so. It’s true that God’s grace and power are big enough to heal a marriage, but wouldn’t it be better to just avoid that crisis in the first place?

Listen to the full episode here!

Some common pitfalls that any marriage may stumble into:
* Pornography and an indulgent fantasy life
* Unrealistic expectations from your spouse
* Comparing your spouse to an idealized version
* Believing it could never happen in your marriage…every marriage is vulnerable!

Some practical steps to keep your marriage protected (this is NOT an exhaustive list!):
* Guard yourself against pornography and sexual triggers
* To “spice up” your sex life, look to Christian resources (a few links below)
* Understand that the person you marry isn’t a project; they may ever change (and               if you’re hoping they will, it might not be time to marry them, just yet)
* See your marriage as a team effort; you’re working toward the same goal. Act like               it.
* Tend to your own pasture…the grass is never greener. Trust me.

These are some of the things we talked about in this episode. Of course, we didn’t cover ideas about finding shared hobbies or interests, or how to effectively listen to your spouse or any one of a hundred other ways you can foster a loving relationship. Those, I’m sure will be covered in future episodes.

Christian resources:
//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=roadhome-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=1589975383&asins=1589975383&linkId=19026be85507a6566e457d86dc28429f&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=true&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff“>No More Headaches

//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=roadhome-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=0785264671&asins=0785264671&linkId=08541fcbc3cbf187e8db40bc2a132114&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=true&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff“>A Celebration of Sex

//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=roadhome-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=0307444945&asins=0307444945&linkId=42d9346345ac7e8c70fe2364700dc927&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=true&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff“>Intimate Issues

//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=roadhome-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=0800725840&asins=0800725840&linkId=fb42df6d3565da55f972b8e2ea88a87d&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=true&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff“>The Language of Sex

There are so many more resources available for the Christian couple. Whether you’ve got questions you’re uncomfortable asking anyone else, you want some ideas for how to put the spark back in your marriage or you simply want to know how to make your spouse feel more loved, there is a myriad of books out there.

To see Christian books only and not be worried about being bombarded with potential triggers or porn, check out Christian Book Distributors.

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You can also email us with questions, comments, show ideas or prayer requests.

NOTE: This week’s transcript will likely be out late. I will do my best to have it available as quickly as possible.

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Posted in September 2018

Summer and Smoke

“Life is full of little mercies like that,
not big mercies but comfortable little mercies.
And so we are able to keep on going.” – Alma Winemiller
Tennessee Williams; Summer and Smoke

We were sixteen years old when we met.

He was a transplant student, having arrived part way through our Junior year of high school. I was introduced to him along with a group of my friends, as we sat at our usual lunch table. Our theater teacher led him over and told us we had a new student in the drama program, would we please take him under our collective wing and welcome him into our group.

It wasn’t hard to do. He had shaggy blond hair, golden sun-kissed skin and dimples that melted my heart with his first smile.

Within that first year, we did a scene together from Tennessee Williams’ play, Summer and Smoke. He played the naughty little boy, John and I played Alma, the sweet minister’s daughter next door. (Our roles should have been reversed.) In that scene, we had our first kiss, a quick peck on the cheek.

Six years later, we walked down the aisle and promised to love, honor and cherish each other till death do us part. What easy words to say and mean when you’re caught in the throes of love and wonder.

Slightly harder when reality crashes in and you’re suddenly met with the very real fact that your life now includes caring for someone else’s needs more than your own on a daily basis. Oh, sure, you still mean what you said that hot June day, but actually living it out is harder than you’d imagined it would be.

And then one day, those vows get lost in the selfishness of your own desires and soon, the life you’d always imagined you’d build together begins to crack in a thousand different ways until you’re looking at nothing more than a pile of rubble.

When we sat across from each other 15 years into our marriage and decided that we were going to stay side by side and fight for what we’d built, we started with a very practical exercise.

We went back to the beginning.

What made me “me” and what made Matt “Matt”?

We shared stories of our childhoods. Going back to the earliest memories we could muster. We shared the first time we were let down by someone we loved, we shared the moment we first realized that Mom and Dad can’t always protect us from the bogeymen that walk among us. We talked about rejection and shame. We cried over the memories that scarred us, leaving us damaged, broken adults.

And what we realized in the space of a few hours was that, though we’d grown up in different places under different circumstances, we were really, pretty much the same little kid deep down inside.

We were both insatiably curious about anything and everything. We both loved a good story and had rich imaginations. We both felt really small and often unheard in a world full of giants.

litle Brandy little Matt in barn

Brandy, approx. 5 years old; circa 1978                Matt, approx. 4 years old, circa 1977
What we realized was simple: we were two adults that had been hurt in life as little kids (because let’s face it, we all get hurt in one way or another) and we had carried those hurts and fears into our adulthoods and ultimately, our marriage. Those places of childhood hurt had resulted in us each seeking different ways to fill or replace whatever we felt had been lacking.

It didn’t make us bad people. It just made us broken people.

Seeing each other through a new lens, that of a child has helped us to understand and appreciate each other more. We’re more patient and understanding than we used to be. We recognize more easily when the other is being reminded of a loss or hurt that reaches the depths of the subconscious. We’re gentler, kinder and more sympathetic.

We’re not perfect.

We still have our moments, but more often than not, when I look at Matt now, I don’t just see the adult version that stands before me, with a beard and a job and a mortgage to pay. I see a little 4-year-old, crouched in the barn, with a head full of dreams and a heart already feeling the effects of living in a broken and fallen world.

And it makes me love him even more.

Posted in Podcast Show Notes, September 2018

Show Notes – “Coming Out: I Had An Affair”

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery;’
but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her
has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
– Matthew 5:27-28

Adultery. 

Not a very pretty word is it? But there it is. In black and white. You can sugar-coat it and call it something different, but it’s all the same ugly sin.

This week, we dive headlong into our own journey of adultery and the grace and redemption that God provided. Eight years have passed since the news came out that shook our world to its core.

We invite you to step into this conversation with us because we hear, on a near daily basis of so many other marriages that are struggling with their own battles of infidelity. We want to bring hope and encouragement to those of you currently walking this path and in next week’s episode, we want to provide some common pitfalls to avoid or overcome that oftentimes lead to an affair.

Listen to the full episode here

If you are struggling in your own marriage, please listen. Please reach out. To us. A pastor. A counselor. There is grace. There is healing. There is a new beginning available to you and your marriage. You are not alone.

Read the full transcript here

Here are the links to many of the tools I used in my own recovery process:

“Breaking Free” Beth Moore
“When Godly People do Ungodly Things” Beth Moore
“David: A Man After God’s Own Heart” Beth Moore
“The Genesis Process”

Previous episodes can be found here on Google Play!

We can also be found in Apple Podcasts (formerly iTunes), Stitcher, iHeartRadio, Spotify and pretty much any podcast app. Please share with your friends, neighbors, people you love, and people you love to hate because everybody needs a little encouragement and grace.

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Special shout-out to our friend, Phil who has recently become a Patreon supporter! We appreciate your encouragement and kindness!

Alright…Love God. Love People. Pray hard.

 

Posted in August 2018, Podcast Show Notes

Show Notes: “Lessons from the Road Trips We Took”

Hey y’all! This week is our final episode in the summer mini-series we’ve been doing called “Lessons from the Road.”

Listen to the full episode here

What better way to finish it off than with a road trip with our favorite listeners?

Admittedly, the audio isn’t perfect in this episode, but we had a fun time driving to a local hot-spot, Dodge Park where we got out and sat by the river while we talked about road trips we’ve both taken recently and the lessons we each learned.

Where Brandy went:

DSC_0368 (2)

St. Ignatius Mission, Montana: Link here

DSC_0351 (2)

Youth With A Mission; Lakeside, Montana Link here

20180817_132800

The Montana Vortex and House of Mystery Link here

 

Matt and I would encourage you all to check out the links to these locations and if you’re ever able to get to these destinations, be sure to let us know what you think!

 

Where Matt went:

Ashland

Oregon Shakespeare Festival; Ashland, Oregon Link here

Lithia Park

Lithia Park; Ashland, Oregon Link here

 

More pictures of Brandy’s trip can be found here and in upcoming posts, as well as on our social media links.

Speaking of which…you can find us on FacebookPinterest, Instagram

You can also email us your show suggestions, questions, prayer requests, or road trip stories.

Be sure to join us next week as we kick off Season 2 with bang! We’re jumping right into the deep waters, so stay tuned and share with a friend!

Intro and Outro Music: “The Long Road Home” Written by Brandy J. Goebel, Arrangement by James Swanson, Performed by James Page. Copyright 2018.

Posted in August 2018

A Heritage of Faith

Stepping out of the car at St. Ignatius Mission in Montana, the air was thick with smoke from recent fires throughout the western US and Glacier National Park. Everything was quiet and still.

Before us stood the Mission Church, the place where, in approximately 1890, my great, great grandfather, Eli “Kelly” Cyr was raised from the age of 8, after his mother died of lung fever. The eldest of 5 children, Eli and his brothers were sent to St. Ignatius Mission while his two younger sisters, under the age of 2, were sent to live with relatives until they were old enough to join their brothers.

Eli and brothers - youngEli (far right) and his younger brothers, circa 1890.

“The Mission, and the town that grew up around it, was founded in 1854 by Jesuit missionaries and named for their founder, St. Ignatius Loyola. In the following years it was the home of the first Jesuit theologate and industrial arts school in the Northwest, the first Catholic Sisters and Catholic school in Montan, and the first hospital, sawmill, flour mill, printing press, carpenter shop and blacksmith shop in the Mission Valley.”
– excerpt from St. Ignatius Mission: Historical Site. 1977

St. Ig and school (2)“Main Street of St. Ignatius with Mission Church and School in background about 1895.”

During his time at the Mission, under the tutelage of the brothers and sisters, Eli learned how shoemaking, music, and cooking. Each of these skills proved beneficial as Eli struck out on his own, eventually marrying and having a daughter. Through the years, he was a cobbler, a bandleader, and the owner of a confectionary and a restaurant.

DSC_0368 (2)While the Mission was founded in 1854, this church wasn’t built until the 1890s and is one of the last remaining buildings affiliated with the Mission due to multiple fires and lack of funding.

Construction of the Mission Church was completed in approximately 1893. Walking through its thick, oak doors one is immediately met with an impressive array of murals covering the walls and ceiling. These murals were all painted by the Jesuit cook and handyman, Brother Joseph Carignano. Brother Joseph had no formal art training, but he did have a vision and a dedication to the project he felt called to.

St. Ig interior
The three paintings behind the altar are representations of three visions that St. Ignatius Loyola had. Above, is a depiction of the Last Judgement. 

Though the Mission Church was not fully completed before Eli Cyr had grown enough to strike out on his own, and while many of the buildings were destroyed by fire, there are still remnants of what was there during his time.

flour mill then (2)The flour mill was in operation from 1864-1934

flour mill nowThe flour mill now. Just a shadow of its former self, yet beautiful all the same.

 

flour mill stonesThe flour grinding stones that remain are now located near the Mission Church as a testimony to the productivity of 70 years.

St. Ignatius Mission was a vast community in its heyday. There are no longer records to let us know how many boys and girls came through its doors as students or orphans, much less the Jesuit Brothers and Ursuline Sisters. And while many of its buildings are no longer standing, it is a treat to walk through the grounds and get a sense of the history.

log buildingBuilt in 1854 by the Jesuit Fathers and Brothers, what is now the Mission Museum was originally a log cabin that the Brothers slept in. The upstairs is no longer accessible as it has been ceilinged off. 

I do wish I knew some of what my great, great grandfather thought about his time there. There aren’t any actual stories from him that have survived time, just shadows that he passed on to his daughter, faint traces of a young boy who, for the most part, enjoyed his time with the Sisters, especially in the kitchen.

It was an absolute joy to make a connection, however distant, to someone I’ve only heard and read stories about. Eli was a man who, like us all, struggled with his faith and how to live it out. I’m sure he didn’t do it perfectly. But he did it.

As an adult, he helped build a church or two. He and his wife, Clara, were constantly opening their home to whatever Father, Brother or Sister was coming through their small town. Their hospitality was bigger than their budget and everyone seemed to be blessed by their friendship.

And while my family now is not Catholic, it’s good to be able to see a bit of my ancestral past and know that there is a heritage of faith that has been built through the generations. I hope it will continue to grow for many generations to come.

 

DSC_0280My traveling buddies, left to right: Evan (son), Molly (daughter), Jenna (friend). 

 

Tune in next week to see more of our travels…

Until then, Love God. Love people. Pray hard.
-B.

[Cover image by Donnie Sexton]

 

Posted in August 2018, Podcast Show Notes

Lessons from the Road to Calvary: Why the Cross Matters

Hey y’all! I’m really excited about this episode because my dad is joining me in it!

What? How can that be?

No, I haven’t figured out a way to communicate with people beyond the grave, but I am super fortunate that my dad recorded a bunch of his music over the years and I have some of it. So, at the conclusion of this episode, you will hear my dad singing a song he wrote in the ’80s. It was recorded in our garage studio, the original Throne Together Studios with his good friend, Phil.

(Shout out to Phil, who’s been a worship pastor for a lot of years and now has a ministry ministering to men and women who lead us weekly in worship. Go check him out here. He’s a cool dude.)

Anyway, this week’s episode is what it’s all about. It’s why we are so passionate about bringing you this show every week. It’s all about Jesus and the price He paid so we could come face to face with the God who made us.

Listen to the full episode!

You can also read the full transcript here.

Though only one scripture was directly referred to, many were referenced. Here are some of them:

*The Gospel accounts that relate the story from just before the crucifixion until Jesus’          ascension to heaven: Matthew 26-28, Mark 14-16, Luke 22-24, John 17-21

*Jesus clarifying the fulfillment of the law (“You have heard it said…”): Matthew 5:21-         22 and verses 27-30.

*Paul’s explanation of the fulfillment of the law: Galatians 3:10-29

*Grace is a complete and free gift: Ephesians 2:8-9

*God calling you the apple of His eye: Zechariah 2:8

If you have any questions or want to know more about dedicating your life to God, please get in touch with us. We would love to answer any questions we can or help put you in touch with someone close to you who can help guide you. 

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Getting in touch with us is as easy as emailing us. We look forward to hearing from you!

*          *          *

Intro Music: “The Long Road Home” Written by Brandy J. Goebel, Arrangement by James Swanson, Performed by James Page. Copyright 2018.

Outro Music: “The Man on Calvary” Written, arranged and performed by Jim Page. Copyright 2018.

Posted in August 2018

A Loss for Words

Well, it’s finally happened.

I’ve run out of words.

What’s meant to be a piece relating to this week’s episode is instead going to be me saying I don’t know what to say.

Y’all…I’m exhausted! This summer has been so busy! We’re finally at that age where our kids are growing up and doing more independently and with friends and I had the weird notion that life would slow down a bit. I was wrong.

I don’t know exactly why it’s been such a whirlwind, I just know that it has.

That being said, I think I need a break.

By the time you’re reading this, I will be in Lakeside, Montana with 3 teenagers. We’re going to go look at the Youth With A Mission campus there. That’s where I went over 20 years ago and it started something new in me. Now, it’s my daughter’s turn. As she considers what she wants to do after high school, this seems like a good option.

We’ll see. All I know is, I’ve got three teenagers in the car for 4 days for a super fast road trip and I’m really, truly excited!

I’ll fill you in upon my return.

In the meantime, have an amazing finish to the summer or 2018. It’ll be gone before you know it. Make the time count.

‘kay….see you soon!

Love, B.

Posted in August 2018, Podcast Show Notes

Show Notes: “Lessons from the Road to Moriah”

What would you do if God asked you to make the ultimate sacrifice?

Find out how Abraham answered God’s call even when it meant literally sacrificing his own son. Did Abraham’s faith waver? Did he challenge God and suggest another way?

Listen here

Click the link above to hear Abraham’s response.

You can also read the full transcript to follow along or share with a friend who might not be able to listen.

Scripture reference: Genesis 22

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Posted in August 2018

Faithful to All Generations

“For the Lord is good; His lovingkindness is everlasting
and His faithfulness to all generations.”
– Psalm 100:5

This last Sunday a remarkable thing happened. I worshiped at my home church.

Admittedly, this doesn’t sound like such a big deal. But wait…. This was the church building I grew up in, the one I helped pound nails into when I was a little kid. The very building that I watched grow from a tree covered plot of land to a log church at the base of Mt. Hood.

Still, why is that remarkable?

Twenty years ago that church, along with two other churches in the area, decided to have a marriage, so to speak. Three churches became one.

Folks, church merges happen all the time. That’s nothing new. What’s exceptionally rare is when those merges work out.

That’s what happened in this case. Matt and I had already married and moved to Utah so I didn’t get to witness this marriage first-hand, but I heard the good news from family and friends.

And this last Sunday we had a 20-year anniversary reunion to celebrate it all.

Here’s the super cool thing: in that celebration, I got to see people I hadn’t seen in over 20 years. I got to see men and women, now gray and starting to show the effects of age, who helped shape and mold my life as a young believer. It was a beautiful collage of people from varied walks and backgrounds all converging in one place to raise their voices to praise the God who unites us as a family.

But there were several people who weren’t there.

There are those who, like my dad and my former pastor, have already gone to be with the Lord. There were also those missing who had only recently passed away, the wounds still raw from their sudden and early departure. There were those, too, who are coming to the end of their days, their health preventing them from making the trip to join us for such an occasion.

It was a beautiful picture of the Now and the Not Yet.

It was a reminder of the faithfulness of our God who unabashedly pursues us.

I was 7 years old when I asked Jesus to come into my heart and take me to Heaven if I died. I had no idea what I was signing up for. All I knew was that the people around me seemed different and I wanted what they had. I didn’t know it then, but it was hope and joy. They had a confidence that drew me in, wrapping me up in its warm embrace.

In the years that followed that child’s prayer, I continued to watch the older kids and adults that filled my days. I listened to their conversations about their faith and understanding of who God is; I watched as they struggled to put into practice the ideals that the Bible teaches. I saw God’s characteristics being manifested in my family, my youth leaders, my mentors and people who didn’t even know I was watching them.

And little by little, my own faith began to take shape and grow. I had my own struggles and battles to overcome, along with shining moments and clear victories. All the while, there were a handful of adults, wiser and more generous than I, who remained faithful to pray for me as I learned to spread my wings. They came along quietly but boldly, challenging my thinking and encouraging my faith.

In ways big and small, they helped me become the woman I am today. They were gentle and compassionate, full of grace and truth. Without their prayers and willingness to invest in a spiritually clumsy, selfish, and often impetuous kid, it’s impossible to say where I might be now!

As we sang together on Sunday, I closed my eyes and let the music wash over everything. The little church was packed tight and the voices filled it to the rafters with a sweet, sweet sound. And as I looked around afterward and saw the faces of the young and the old, families who were all together from the tiniest babe to the grayest of grays, it was evident that God has indeed been faithful through the generations.

I walked away that day with a sense of awe at how loved by God I am. He has welcomed us each to the table and calls us sons and daughters. He has lavished us with His love and grace. He has gifted us with people to share life with; people that can cheer us on and prod us forward. He has called us to be the same for somebody else.

We are the luckiest people in the world! We are part of the biggest, most inclusive, mixed up, eclectic family. How cool is that?

Who are you investing in? Is there someone in your sphere who needs a spiritual big brother or sister? What are you doing to show them Jesus? If there isn’t anyone like this in your life, why?

I’m just saying…somebody’s watching you. Whether you know it (or want it) or not, if you’ve publicly called yourself a follower of Christ, you are being observed. What are people seeing?

I don’t know about you, but I want to keep this cycle going. I want to sit in church someday with my own children’s children on my lap, knowing that they, too, are being taught the love and truth of a faithful God.

 

(P.S. To my mountain church family, I’m pretty positive that Dad, Stan, Grandma and Grandpa Wall, Jack, Jason, Ed and all the others who have gone before us were joining in the singing. There were angels in the rafters, I’m sure.)